Feel the urgent need to respond to something you've seen here?
Goddamnit. I can't even sit for an hour, quietly painting some miniatures without some jerk coming around telling me to go write stuff!
There are other websites out there on the internet!
But since it apparently only counts if you can directly bad mouth the person whose website you're reading I'll write something. Ahead of schedule. And it will suck. Like most things on this site suck. Seriously, I'm only happy with 2 or 3 articles so far (Yes, out of dozens. Literary genius at work here!)
So enjoy, and leave me alone. I'll write when I'm ready to.
A man's food storage
So what should be in a man's food cabinet? I'm someone who only likes several types of food and it should all be as easy cooked as possible.
In fact, there are only 3 types of food I really like. Meat, bread and beer. You may think that beer is in fact, a drink, but you'd be wrong. Beer, in all its golden deliciousness transcends the traditional boundaries of culinary etiquette and fits right in with the rest of the foods, where it belongs.
So typically, a food cabinet needs to be filled with meat, bread and beer. For illustrative purposes, I took a picture of a random food cabinet at a barbecue I attended recently:
As you can see, the bread is abundantly present. However, the other required food groups are missing and have instead been replaced with highly convenient instant meals and soups. Oh, and there's potato chips. Lots of chips. So much potato chips in fact that I started to wonder if this person developed some sort of weird salt related fetish.
Luckily there was beer present. Mostly because I had brought two crates with me. And meat too, because what the hell is a barbecue if you're not gonna bring any meat?
To my horror, there was also salad, though this problem was quickly brought under control by creative use of police cordon.
Right, that took care of things. Stay clear of salad! It will tear apart your soul.
In conclusion, the presence of beer, meat and bread made it a successful barbecue and the proof has been delivered. A man's food cabinet needs to contain the three holy food groups or it will suck.
Just like this article sucked. Now go away. I'll write when I'm ready.